My boss is thinking 1 of 4 things! Fired? Suspended? Pay Cut? Or the infamous GTFO??? Excuse my french Monsieurs and Madames, but these where my EXACT thoughts right after a flashback: (Roll call before a previous team meeting from the boss “Faukner?” “present” “Smalls?” “Here” “Boyd?”<- Me “Right here” “Johnson?” silence “Boyd…. Where’s Fred Johnson?” “uhhhh… Well…” “Dont bother i’ll just call him… dial his number Johnson… Dont bother commin in… You’re FIRED! Have a nice day”) Have a NICE DAY?!?! Wats nice about ‘You’re Ass Is GRASS!’ Well he didnt say that exactly but was there any room for an explaination before ‘Judge Joe Brown’ SLAMMED the hammer down smh. Anywho my foot is on the pedal hard while watching for cops and next thing you kno I get a text msg from a co-worker… -__- … It reads “Yo Ayo hurry ur ass up! We’re going into a morning team meeting!” And im thinkin “Oh NO!” Have I died and been reincarnated as Fred Johnson!!! slaps both hands on face and screams like Macaulay Culkin so I floor the gas and shoot the bird at all the officers on the highway. Pull up at work drenched like a monkey in a monsoon from sweating bullets. I walk into the office and the meeting was obviously over. Right when my boss looked at me, I imagined his round shiney bald head ass a wall clock… He points at his watch and I clinch my fist waiting for him to mouth the words Fired! Suspended! Pay Cut! Or the infamous GTFO!!! But… Monsieurs and Madames… After pointing at his watch and then at me he simply said “Dont let it happen again” wipes sweat and that right there folks… is the benefit… Of not… Being Fred Johnson.
